A Q&A with Greg Giesen on the True Colors Personality Profile

Q:   What can we learn from the people that trigger us?

A:   Lots. From a True Colors perspective, the majority of people who trigger us will come from our fourth color. Our fourth color is essentially the underdeveloped side of our personality. For many of us, there is a reason our fourth color is our fourth color…we’re either uncomfortable with that side of us or simply uninterested. Either way, being around someone whose primary color is our fourth color highlights what we are not or what we are avoiding; hence the trigger.

Q:   But don’t opposites attract?

A:   Research shows that we are drawn to people who initially differ from us…but tend to select people who are more like us when it comes to long-term relationships. If a Gold personality develops an intimate relationship with an Orange personality, they can have an incredible relationship…that is if and only if they are able to effectively communicate with one-another during conflict and challenging times. In other words, they must be able to utilize their Blue personality side to serve as the glue that keeps their relationship together. If one or both are ineffective communicators, then the differences that initially attracted them to one-another will become points of contention and annoyance later on.

Q:   I believe I’m evenly spread out between all four colors. That’s a good thing, right?

A:   In True Colors, being balanced does not mean being spread out evenly (25%) in each of the four colors. That’s actually confusion, not balance. Why? Because it implies that you are trying to be what everyone else wants you to be with no foundation of who you really are. Balance in True Colors means having clarity about who you are (embracing your innate, primary color) while at the same time being able to flow in and out of the other three colors. If you are comfortable in your own skin and get along with just about anyone, you probably are fairly well balanced from a personality standpoint. If, on the other hand, you get triggered often by people and situations that you find yourself in, you probably lack balance from a True Colors perspective.

Q:   Blue is my primary color…yet I turn Green when around my Blue wife. Why is that?

A:   I’m guessing that your wife is an extreme Blue which causes your Blue side to withdraw a bit; too much Blue in the room, so to speak. The other factor could be the introvert-extravert factor. An introverted Blue essentially “introverts” their Blue while an extraverted Blue “extraverts” their Blue. Both have the same orientation but one expresses their Blueness outwardly while the other expresses it inwardly. This alone can create an uncomfortableness between two Blues. I also wouldn’t be surprised if your Green side emerges as your defense mechanism (i.e., in this case too much extraverted Blue around you). What other scenarios bring out your Green?

Q:   What happens when we are stressed?

A:   Typically when we are stressed we kick into an exaggerated version of our primary color. We do this as a natural mode of self-protective. I might add that an exaggerated version of any of the four colors is a bit much for most people. It’s why stressed people can cause others to become stressed. Personality differences are challenging enough without having to deal with an exaggeration version. It’s like putting salt in the wound. Here’s an example. I’m a Gold; I’m big on control. When I feel out of control, I get stressed. As a result, I fight to regain the very control I’ve lost by becoming more controlling. I do this by creating elaborate lists of all the things I have to do from projects to program deliverables to even personal  tasks that need to be completed. I then assign deadline dates for each before incorporating all of these items into my daily and weekly daytimer. Do you see what I’m talking about? I go a little overboard with the need to be organized (exaggerated form of Gold). My wife knows to leave me alone during these times.

I must admit, this process is actually a stress reduction method for me and it works. Once I feel back in control…my exaggerated Gold behavior dissipates and I am able to ease back into a more balanced flow between all four colors.

Q:   Can our colors change over time?

A:   Our primary color is innate and will always be a foundational aspect of our personality. However, it is possible for one of the other colors to emerge into our life and take over as a predominant aspect of our personality. Carl Jung would say that is common towards the second-half or later years. We’ve essentially “been there, done that” with our primary color and we simply don’t rely on it or need it as much as when we were in the hustle and bustle of life.  Of course this is assuming that life hasn’t thrown any major curves or life challenges at us. Constant change or stress later in life can have a reverse effect where we move into the exaggerated form of our primary color on a regular basis.

My father was a Gold (primary) and a Green (secondary) all of his life but has transcended into more of a Blue the last ten years. Now he’s all about relationships and connecting with people. It’s been a nice transition.

 

I better stop as this is getting a little long. Catch my 11/28/11 Mondays At 3 Radio Show to hear more on True Colors. Also know that my comments are simply my perspective of True Colors and may not be shared by all personality profile trainers and teachers. Lastly, if you’d like to take a free True Colors Personality Assessment, CLICK HERE. It’s the best one I’ve seen so far.

-Geese

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